By: Donald and Cenaca Cyprian, Founder and CEO of Instant Christ™, LLC
1. Make Christ the center of your marriage. Christianity establishes a solid foundation for marriage that is based on the Word of Christ. When Jesus is the center, the chances of having a stronger marriage are much better. My husband and I are able to stand against the secular ways of the world in our marriage by maintaining holiness and a lifestyle that glorifies God. He keeps marriages strong and together for His Glory!
2. Pray and study the Word together. My husband and I have found that praying and reading our Bible as a couple has helped us find our purpose and build a stronger relationship with God. I truly believe the saying “Couples who pray together, stay together.” Moreover, by reading the Bible and going to church together, worshiping seems to be even more moving. It also allows us to help each other gain a better understanding of the Word, and most importantly, it brings us closer together as husband and wife. We become partners in prayer and worship, just as we are in life. Additionally, growing spiritually as a couple helps us to love each other completely and build trust in our marriage, because of the trust we have in God!
3. Know and understand the roles of the husband and the wife. The scriptures are clear in defining the unique roles God assigns to a husband and wife; however, when a married couple’s “house is not in order” the roles can get quite confusing. In Colossians 3:18-19, the bible teaches “Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands love your wives and do not be embittered against them.” This can also be found in Ephesians 5:22-30. It is important to understand that submitting to your husband doesn’t equate to becoming his subordinate, a doormat or tolerating abusive behavior. It simply means recognizing & accepting his role as the leader of the house and showing him love and respect. As the head of the household, men should also love and show respect to their wives, as the New Testament clearly states that women are to be respected, revered, and treated as equals with men. If love and respect are present, then authority, headship, and submission will not pose a problem for either partner. When couples work together as one and put God first then everything else falls into place.
4. Kiss daily! Kissing is intimate and it makes you feel closer. My husband and I start and end each day with a kiss! We can’t fake kissing because it forces us to connect. It also keeps the fire burning and opens the gateway for intimacy. Intimacy in marriage extends far beyond sex! Instead, true intimacy is achieved through sharing thoughts, feelings, connecting with and simply having fun with one another. A life of healthy intimacy is God’s gift to marriage.
5. Communicate with and love each other. Every marriage, including ours, will have its ups and downs, but we don’t let the petty arguments get the best of us. Over the years, we have learned how to control our tempers by operating in the spirit of love. Instead of arguing when there’s a problem, we gather our emotions and approach each other calmly to discuss the issue, without getting loud or being disrespectful. We also made a promise to never go to bed angry or sleep in separate rooms. This breaks down the intimacy we have with each other, and it can slowly cause the marriage to grow apart. We try our best to always communicate and express our love for one another, even when we are upset with each other. Love “is not selfish, is not provoked, and does not keep a record of wrongs” (1 Corinthians 13:5).